<sigh> if only we had the king of the way of the dragon here to tell us who is the best. (but i think even if bruce lee was here, he would choose himself)

GO BRUCE LEE!

"I fear not the man that has practiced one thousand kicks once, but do fear the man that practiced one kick a thousand times" -Bruce Lee

I.B., please understand that I give mad props to Bruce Lee, but really, he wouldn't even see Chuck coming.

chuck norris? what a joke! as said by the gods of martial arts.

"Bruce Lee, See?"

Lol

My Chuck Norris Opening was original, but that's about the best I can come up with.  Experience has shown that I'm a great at appreciating comedy, but not nearly as good at generating it...!  =P

Great stuff! Thanks guys, Anyone wanna take a stab at a fresh CHUCK NORRIS joke? Im workin on a couple myself. Never let anyone say the CHUCK NORRIS jokes are old! lol

"Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas."  LOL!

Hey actually, guys, there appear to be quite a few Chuckheads on this site.  Just search for his name and more awesomeness will await you...

http://chuckbrown.com/undisputed-facts-about-chuck-norris.html

Chuck Mate Baby!

You know what Interroban... THANK YOU lol. Come on guys, Lets make this the biggest Chuck tribute in history. I want your best Chuck photos and slogans! I know you got em on that computer somewhere. "Whats that?!" Computer not working so great? Just say "CHUCK NORRIS!" and your computer will fix itself in 3 seconds.

Okay, my top ten:

10. Chuck Norris does not believe in chemistry.  The only element he recognizes is the element of surprise.

9. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

8. Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker to make his coffee.  He grinds the beans with his teeth and boils the water with the fury of his own rage.

7. Crop circles are Chuck Norris's way of telling the world that sometimes corn just needs to lie down.

6. In 1996, a group of scientists calculated that the energy contained in a single Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could supply the energy needs of the entire United States for three months.  Some subsequently attempted to find a way to capture and harness this energy.  None survived.

5. Chuck Norris once played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

4. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk, and kill.

3. Chuck Norris doesn't read books...he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

2. Chuck Norris is the only man to have ever beaten a brick wall in a game of tennis.

1. When children get ready to sleep, they check their closets for monsters.  When monsters get ready to sleep, they check their closets for Chuck Norris.  Chuck Norris does not sleep...he waits.

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And in case you don't know who this powerhouse of a man is, let me illustrate the situation in chess terms.

The Chuck Norris Opening :

1.e2-e4    e4-e2
2.e2-e4    Cxe1
0-1.

(The C stands for "Chuck".)

Come on guys, gimme ur best of Chuck, and I want it ALL!!!